Here's how to get the most out of your live chat

Live chat can be tricky. If you don't know what you're doing when you log into an adult chat site, you'll probably end up wasting your time and totally wasting a perfectly good boner.

When you're going into a chatroom or using a sexy chat app to look for some strange, you have to understand what you're getting into! You can't just go into a chatroom and expect a bunch of women to jump on you immediately. You have to show that you're worth their time. Because you're not the only one in the chatroom looking to get off, the women are too!

And unlike a one-night-stand, the other person isn't going to tolerate sub-par sexual skills for the sake of being polite or embarrassing the hell out of you by leaving (which does happen… so step it up, guys)! But if you're boring someone in an online chat, they always have the option of disappearing and blocking you so that they don't have to deal with any fallout.

That being said, you have to make sure that you're sexting game is on point if you want to get anything out of an online sex chat sesh. So, if you didn't learn this by fumbling your way through the birth of the digital age, you might be a little clueless. Here's a guide as to how to sex it up in an instant chat room.

  1. Do: Ask what they're into

    One of the most important things to keep in mind is that, just like sex, this interaction is not about you. Half of it is about you. You have to make sure that you're not the only one who's enjoying themselves. If you want to be the only one being entertained and if you don't want to put any effort forth, then you should watch porn… not interact with another person.

    Instead of only seeking to satisfy yourself, you should have a quick little discussion about what one another are into. See what kind of fantasies your partner is into and share some of your own! Because when it comes down to it, this is half about you so you should make sure that you're communicating what you want. Plus, since it's all online, you can make your wildest fantasies come true! So, go wild, my guy. I mean go wild within reason, but then again what does "within reason" really mean on the internet…

    Figure out what they're into and make sure that you make sure to touch on those interests in your sexting endeavors! Because if you make them happy, they'll want to make you happy too!

  2. Don't: "Haha, then what? ;)"

    This is the ultimate sexting no-no. This is the sexting equivalent of saying "ok cool" or "k" during a riveting conversation. It's just not something you should do! It's so lazy and an immediate conversation killer. Plus, this is one sure-fire way to get someone to log-off and block you out of sheer boredom.

    Doing this shows that not only that you're lazy, but that you are a terrible multi-tasker. I know that it's hard to type with one hand, but when it comes down to it you have to show that you're invested… and that might mean taking your hand off your dick to type a meaningful sentence. Plus, if you can't manage to sext and jerk-it, how could the fantasize about you since multitasking is key to being a great lover.

    If I could give you one sex tip it's that you need to make sure that you're not lazy with your words (both online and in person). Instead of saying some bullshit, lazy thing like "haha, then what?", you should say something else sexy! Further, the narrative, move the sex-time along, you can't just expect the girl to take the wheel. That's not fair, unless she said she wants to single-handily write a full fledgederotica for you.

  3. Do: Be creative during your sex chat

    Again, like sex, your sexting shouldn't be boring. You have to make sure that you don't do the same-ol-same-ol when you're sexting. Even if you're messaging someone for the first time, you should always try something a little new. Why? Because everyone has seen everything, especially on the internet.

    Even if your something different is something that you'd only really enjoy in theory and not so much in practice, you should still give it a try. Why? Well because it'll be exciting for not only you but the other person. This is a great way to keep your partner interested but also coming back for more.

  4. Don't: "Mmm bb that feelz so good."

    This is another incredibly lazy thing you could do. Also, it's a little innacurate… unless you're roleplaying (with both actions and dialogue), then it kind of doesn't make sense to say something like that. You have to make sure that whatever you're doing or saying is furthering the theoretical sexual scenario and this is not one of those things.

    Plus, since words are the only thing that you're going off of to get off, you can't really pull shit where you're abbreviating like a teenager texting. Saying something that's abbreviated like that not only makes you look a little dumb and insanely lazy, but you're totally killing the sexy vibes of your conversation.

  5. Do: BE NICE before and after sex chatting

    One thing I hate about the internet, in general, is how mean people are. And for some reason anytime sex is involved, things escalate way too quickly. I wonder if it has anything to do with tensions and emotions running high… but guys (and girls) tend to get super mean when sexting doesn't go their way.

    And another thing that happens is that people like to call each other sluts and whores when things don't go their way or just to be mean… So my advice is not to do that! Just be nice! Don't call people a slut! Don't be mean if someone doesn't want to internet fuck you. Just be nice and more people are going to want to sext you. I promise you'll have a lot more people coming back for more.

  6. Don't: Deviate from their interests

    One thing that you can't do is deviate from what someone wants. Sure, you can satisfy your own interests! That's totally allowed, and that's totally fine, but if someone says that they're not into something and you bring that into the sexting sesh anyway… that's not cool, my dude. That's really not cool.

    That's almost like if you were having sex with someone and they said they weren't into anal and you tried to do it anyway. It's not cool, it's a total turn off, and it could get you blocked, banned, or reported. So, don't do that! Stick to what they like, and avoid what the explicitly don't like, and you're golden.

  7. Do: Keep in contact via live chat

    If you find someone that you totally vibe with, you should keep in contact. Sure, messaging sexy things to a stranger can be sexy and arousing on its own. But you should try to keep in contact with someone you are totally getting on with because if you get to know one another, your sexting sessions might get steamier.

    This is another tip for hot sexting that I can give you, keep in touch with the people you have chemistry with!

    When you allow yourself to build a connection with someone, you might feel more comfortable going into fantasies that you wouldn't otherwise share with anyone else. Plus you can remain somewhat anonymous by not sharing your name or what you look like. It's like having a familiar stranger you can always talk dirty with!. So download something like Kik to keep in touch while maintaining a certain amount of anonymity.

Kayla is online and wants to chat.